I have access to a lot of wonderful technology that makes it super easy to create and share art: my laptop, a scanner, my tablet, the high-quality camera, etc. I feel so blessed that my socioeconomic position enables this; so grateful that my dad has worked hard and been successful. Grateful that my mom has worked hard and been successful. Grateful that my grandparents worked hard and were successful!
But I also know that part of the reason they all succeeded is that my family is White, my parents are heterosexual, and so on. Thus I also feel guilty. Guilty that I have this wonderful technology to play with when other people can't afford it. Guilty that I have it not due to my own effort; other people work much harder than me and still can't access the bounty I have in my home. And then I feel like I'm wasting all this amazing technology by just doing my own silly projects, and not producing some grand piece of art that would be impressive and moving and beautiful.
But this guilt isn't productive. It just makes me feel bad. I only have so much energy and inspiration, and what I do is enough. I kinda don't believe that, but I know I should.
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